Funny Money Quotes

I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
- Henry Youngman
Las Vegas is the only place I know where money really talks - it says, Goodbye.
- Frank Sinatra
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
- Lana Turner
Money is something you have to make in case you don't die.
- Max Asnas
Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income- which he then spends sending his son to college.
- Bill Vaughan
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it rains.
-Robert Frost
If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem.
-J. Paul Getty
He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money.
- Benjamin Franklin
The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
- Frank Hubbard
Money in the bank is like toothpaste in the tube. Easy to take out, hard to put back.
-Earl Wilson
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
- Sam Ewing
There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.
-Jack Yelton
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
- Earl Wilson
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
- Bob Hope
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen
If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys.
- James Goldsmith
Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping.
- Bo Derek
Money will buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail.
- Richard Friedman
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben
A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist.
- Franklin Jones

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